150 Best Funny Harry Potter Memes and Jokes That Will Accio Your Laughter

Accio laughter! Ready to ditch the Dark Arts and embrace some lighthearted magic? We’ve brewed up a cauldron full of the funniest Harry Potter memes and jokes guaranteed to charm your socks off.

Whether you’re a Gryffindor, Slytherin, Hufflepuff, or Ravenclaw, prepare for a hilarious journey through the wizarding world.

Get ready to share these side-splitting Harry Potter memes and jokes with your fellow Potterheads! Let the giggling commence!

Best Funny Harry Potter Memes and Jokes That Will Accio Your Laughter

• Why did Voldemort cross the playground? To get to the other slide! He heard there was a special “death drop.”
• Heard about the new Harry Potter-themed restaurant? It’s called “The Leaky Cauldron…of Savings!” (Their prices are surprisingly reasonable).
• Ron: “I’m not good at chess.” Harry: “Don’t say that, Ron. You’re a pawn star!”
• What do you call a lazy kangaroo? Pouch potato! (He’s probably waiting for his Hogwarts letter, too.)
• Dumbledore: “Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times…” Me: *checks bank account* “Yeah, well, I guess I’m Voldemort then.”
• Professor Flitwick’s favorite band? The Cranberries (Wingardium Levio-SA!)
• Why was Snape bad at poker? Because he always had an ace up his sleeve…and a permanent scowl.
• “I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.” – Me, about to microwave fish in the office kitchen.
• Hermione: “I’m going to bed.” Harry: “But it’s only 8 PM!” Hermione: “I need to recharge my Hermione Granger!”
• My Patronus is a perpetually confused sloth. Accurate, I think.
• Breaking News: Sirius Black escapes Azkaban! Officials say he was last seen chasing a squirrel. Apparently, he’s gone barking mad.
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Auror. Auror who? Auror-gone be a problem if you don’t open this door!
• Dobby’s favorite type of music? House elf music.
• Hagrid: “I shouldn’t have said that.” Me, after accidentally summoning a swarm of bees with a faulty spell.
• Voldemort trying to hug Draco: “Come to the Dark Side, we have Malfoy Manor!”

Snape’s Sass: Hilarious Harry Potter Memes About the Potion Master

Severus Snape’s dry wit and cutting remarks make him prime meme material! “Snape’s Sass” captures the best of these hilarious Harry Potter memes, showcasing the Potion Master’s iconic snark. Prepare to laugh at his epic burns, sarcastic stares, and general disdain for everything Gryffindor. It’s a darkly humorous tribute to…

• Snape’s dating profile would just consist of an ingredients list for a potion with a single review that said, “Intense, but effective. 3 stars”.
• Snape walks into a coffee shop and orders a black coffee, the barista asks “Do you want some sugar?” Snape replies, “Always”.
• My therapist told me to embrace my inner Severus, so I started leaving passive-aggressive notes around the office, and now I am unemployed.
• Why was Snape such a bad gardener? Because he always had a hard time getting his lilies to bloom, a real black bloom if you ask me.
• Snape’s Patronus? A permanently disappointed houseplant with a bad haircut, but it gets the job done.
• Snape’s biggest fear is that he will have to teach Dumbledore how to make potions, and the results would be catastrophic.
• What is Snape’s favorite song? A moody ballad about unrequited love and the importance of following instructions, but it is still a rock song!
• Snape’s LinkedIn profile: Potions Master, Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Skills include: Occlumency, sarcasm, and brewing complex potions with a scowl, and also with a lot of skill.
• “Turn to page 394,” said Snape, knowing full well that there was nothing on page 394, and he just wanted to punish the students.
• Snape walks into a library and asks for books about hair care. The librarian whispers, “They’re right behind you, and also, they are in the children’s section”.
• Snape’s favorite pick-up line: “I can teach you how to bottle fame, brew glory, even stopper death… but first, tell me your name, and what you’re looking for.”
• Snape’s biggest pet peeve is when students make a potion that actually works, and he has to admit that they are good, a true struggle for him.
• My new aftershave. “Eau de Snape.” It’s subtle, mysterious, and will remind you of your childhood trauma.
• Snape is the type of person to use dark magic to get a good deal on Amazon, and not feel bad about it.
• Why did Snape never smile? Because he knew a lot about the world, and there was nothing to smile about.

Accio Laughs: Kid-Friendly Harry Potter Jokes and Puns

Need a break from dark magic memes? “Accio Laughs” brings kid-friendly Harry Potter jokes and puns to the table! It’s perfect for sharing giggles with young witches and wizards, offering lighthearted humor alongside the snarky memes we all love. Discover a whole new realm of Potter-themed fun!

• Why did Voldemort start a garden? He wanted to plant Slyther-in his basil.
• What is a Muggle’s favorite part of a joke? When the punchline is coming.
• If Death Eaters had a dating app, it would be called ‘Snapes Mate’, and it would be a disaster.
• Why was Snape such a bad gardener? He had a hard time getting his lilies to bloom.
• What do you call a sad Harry Potter? A melancholy wizard with a bad future.
• Why is Voldemort so good at Quidditch? Because he has no body to hold him back.
• Did you hear about the new Harry Potter spin-off where Voldemort becomes a therapist? It’s called “The Power He Knows Not”.
• What is Dumbledore’s favorite type of music? Anything with a good harmony, and a good feeling.
• What do you call a magic owl and a lawyer? Hoo-dini.
• Why did Harry Potter cross the playground? To get to the other slide.
• I tried to make a Harry Potter-themed cake, but it was a real sorting hat-astrophe.
• What do you call a musical about Harry Potter? A spellbinding performance, and fun for the whole family.
• Why did Voldemort join a band? Because he heard they needed a good bass player.
• Hagrid’s dating profile: Seeking someone who appreciates magical creatures, and has a high tolerance for unexpected pet spiders and dragons.
• What do you call a vampire who went to Hogwarts? A Transylvania grad, but they did not do well.

Sorting Hat Shenanigans: Funny Harry Potter Memes About Houses

Ever wondered what the Sorting Hat *really* thinks? “Sorting Hat Shenanigans” dives into the hilarious possibilities! From Slytherins requesting Hufflepuff to Gryffindors begging for Ravenclaw (for the smarts, naturally), these memes explore the Hat’s imagined internal struggles and the students’ desperate, funny pleas. Prepare for house pride (and rivalry) with…

• The Sorting Hat just yelled “Hufflepuff!” and now I have to pretend I’m okay with liking badgers, but I wanted to be a wizard.
• That awkward moment when the Sorting Hat yells “Slytherin!” and your mom starts crying about your life choices.
• Ravenclaws are so smart, they already know what house they’re in before the Sorting Hat even touches their head, and also how to take over the world.
• That awkward moment when the Sorting Hat can’t decide between Gryffindor and Slytherin, and you are having an existential crisis, but mostly you are just scared.
• Hufflepuffs are just Gryffindors who are too nice to be jerks, and that is a special thing to have in a wizard.
• Why did the Sorting Hat go to therapy? It had trouble making decisions, and it was constantly having an existential crisis.
• The Sorting Hat put me in Hufflepuff, but said I had the ambition of a Slytherin, but I was too nice to be mean, so the hat had to make a choice.
• Why did Voldemort want to be in Slytherin? It is a great house, and he wanted to take over the world, but also, he did not get in.
• I asked the Sorting Hat if it could sort my laundry, but it said it only deals with existential crises, and also magic.
• The Sorting Hat yelled “Hufflepuff,” and now I have to pretend that I’m okay with liking badgers, but I wanted to be in Slytherin.
• That awkward moment when the Sorting Hat suggests Hufflepuff, but you are a werewolf, it is not a good look for the house.
• I tried to bribe the Sorting Hat with a chocolate frog, but it said it only accepts Bertie Bott’s Every Flavor Beans, and also that it is not corruptible.
• The Sorting Hat put me in Ravenclaw, but said I had the bravery of a Gryffindor, but also that I was too book smart, it was a real challenge for the hat.
• Hufflepuff: where loyalty is rewarded, and all the bake sales are really good, and everyone is nice to be around, which is a win.
• That awkward moment when the Sorting Hat yells “Gryffindor!” and you realize you are actually just a Hufflepuff at heart, and you start to cry.

Dumbledore’s Wisdom (or Lack Thereof): Adult Harry Potter Jokes

Ah, adult Harry! Suddenly, Dumbledore’s cryptic advice seems less profound and more like avoidance. Funny Harry Potter memes brilliantly lampoon his questionable wisdom, highlighting the irony of Harry facing Voldemort with vague instructions. Was Dumbledore truly wise, or just exceptionally lucky? The jokes practically write themselves.

• Dumbledore’s office is the Room of Requirement for hoarding.
• I’m not saying Voldemort was a bad guy, but he did create more jobs in the wizarding world than the Ministry of Magic.
• Hogwarts tuition is so high, that the students have to work, and that is why they are always breaking the rules.
• Snape: Always the potions master, never the head of HR, and always a jerk.
• Harry tried to get a job, but his best skill was knowing how to fly, so he could only get a position as a delivery boy.
• Why did Voldemort cross the road? To get to the dark side, and also because he was in a hurry.
• I’m convinced that Dumbledore was secretly a time traveler, which is why he always gave cryptic advice.
• Hagrid is a gentle giant, but I feel bad for everyone who has to live next to him, I would never sleep.
• Hermione: “I’m going to bed.” Harry: “But it’s only 8 PM!” Hermione: “I need to recharge my Hermione Granger powers!”
• Snape’s LinkedIn profile: Potions Master, Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Skills include: Occlumency, sarcasm, and brewing complex potions with a scowl.
• You know you’re a true Ravenclaw when you start correcting people’s pronunciation of spells, and also you like to read.
• I tried to make a joke about the Yule Ball, but it turned out to be ice-cold, and also there was a lot of ice, and there was a lot of dancing.
• The only thing more dangerous than Voldemort is a librarian who’s just trying to enforce the quiet rule.
• If Harry Potter had a dating app, it would be called “Muggle Match,” and it would be a disaster.
• I’m pretty sure my Patronus is just a stress ball, because that’s all that’s keeping me from cracking under the pressure.

“He Who Must Not Be Named” Comedy: Dark Humor Harry Potter Memes

Venture into the darker side of the wizarding world with “He Who Must Not Be Named” comedy! These memes playfully poke fun at Voldemort and his Death Eaters, offering a twisted, hilarious take on the series. If you enjoy subversive humor that doesn’t shy away from the dark arts, prepare…

• “I’m not saying Voldemort is bad, but I have never seen him with a pet, or have a friend, or do anything nice.”
• “Have you tried turning into a snake to get into the girls’ bathroom? It is a bit Slytherin-y.”
• I’m not saying Voldemort is a bad guy, but his nose disappeared mysteriously, and also he has no friends.
• “I’ve got a bone to pick with you, Voldemort.”
• He tried to kill me as a baby, but he is so afraid of death; who is the real villain?
• If Voldemort had a LinkedIn, his skills would include: dark arts, manipulation, and dramatic monologues, but he can’t use a pen.
• “I’m not saying He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named is a bad guy, but his interior decorating skills are definitely lacking, he has no taste.”
• The real reason Voldemort couldn’t be defeated? A crippling fear of commitment to a proper skincare routine, mostly because his nose was gone.
• I tried to make a joke about Voldemort, but it was too dark, and also would end up getting me killed.
• Voldemort is just a misunderstood guy who needs a hug, but you should probably not hug him.
• “I’m not saying Voldemort was a bad guy, but he did try to kill a baby, and that’s not a good look.”
• “I’m convinced Voldemort is just misunderstood and needs some friends, but he killed them all, so he is alone.”
• “I’d like to thank Voldemort for providing me with a lifetime supply of trauma and the motivation to become a wizard, and also a lot of anger.”
• “I’m not saying Voldemort had a rough childhood, but his stuffed animal was a basilisk, it was not a childhood dream.”
• “I’m convinced Voldemort was just trying to find a decent therapist, but he kept accidentally Avada Kedavra-ing them because he was too angry.”

Wingardium Leviosa Your Mood: Uplifting and Funny Harry Potter Jokes

Feeling down? Accio laughter! “Wingardium Leviosa Your Mood” is your spell for instant joy. Dive into a cauldron of hilarious Harry Potter jokes and memes. From Snape’s sarcasm to Ron’s blunders, this collection will levitate your spirits and have you chuckling like you’ve just discovered a secret passage to the…

• Why don’t wizards use social media? Because they prefer personal owls!
• Hagrid: “I shouldn’t have said that.” Me, after accidentally summoning a swarm of bees with a faulty spell.
• “Expelliarmus!” – The most useful spell in the Harry Potter universe, and also, the most effective way to disarm someone who is trying to steal your TV remote.
• Dumbledore said, “It does not do well to dwell on dreams and forget to live, let me order a pizza and watch anime, I’m tired.”
• Snape’s dating profile would just consist of an ingredients list for a potion with a single review that said, “Intense, but effective. 3 stars”.
• Why was Voldemort so bad at gardening? Because he couldn’t get anything to grow, since he was always trying to kill everything!
• Harry and Ron’s study group is just them copying Hermione’s homework, and it is the only way they can pass the test, and also, I relate.
• “I’m not saying I’m a Gryffindor, but I did just trip over a troll in the bathroom and somehow survived.”
• What is Voldemort’s favorite Christmas song? “Hark! The Herald Angels Sing,” because he is a true angel of the night.
• Professor Flitwick’s favorite band? The Cranberries (Wingardium Levio-SA!)
• That awkward moment when you realize you’re more of a Neville Longbottom than a Harry Potter, but you are still trying.
• Snape’s Patronus? A permanently disappointed houseplant with a bad haircut.
• I tried to explain the concept of a “Muggle” to my grandma. She said, “Oh, you mean like those people who can’t work their phones?”
• You know you’re a true Ravenclaw when you spend more time in the library than you do with your friends, and also, you love to read.
• “I’m not saying I’m a bad wizard, but I did accidentally turn my cat into a teapot, and I am not sure how to fix it.”

Instagram-Worthy Wizardry: Harry Potter Meme Captions for Social Media

Unleash your inner wizard with hilarious Harry Potter memes! Our collection offers perfect Instagram captions to charm your followers. From witty puns about Voldemort to relatable Hogwarts struggles, these captions will add magical humor to your social media. Prepare for likes and laughter as you share the wizarding world’s funniest…

• Hagrid can’t find his phone. Me: “Did you try turning it off and then onion?”
• Snape’s dating profile would just consist of an ingredients list for a potion with a single review that said, “Intense, but effective. 3 stars.”
• Dobby is a free elf, but he still has to pay his student loans, and he has to work hard to be able to survive.
• Hermione was so smart, she knew what everyone was thinking, and she knew when to ask for help.
• The Sorting Hat put me in Hufflepuff, but said I had the ambition of a Slytherin, but I was too nice to be mean.
• “I solemnly swear that I am up to no good,” said the student, and then he went and did his homework on time.
• “Wingardium Leviosa”, but it is being sung in a hip-hop song, and it is the best-selling song on the billboard.
• Why did Voldemort cross the playground, to get to the other slide, and also to try to take over the world?
• What do you call a wizard who’s always late? Yoda punctual, because he never makes it on time.
• If Harry Potter was a musical, the lyrics would be about love, loss, and also, the burden of saving the world.
• “Yer a wizard Harry,” said Hagrid, who was also a rapper, dropping beats and spells all at once.
• Ron Weasley is so honest, he can’t even lie about what he had for dinner, he says “It was great, but also a little cold.”
• My therapist told me to embrace my inner wizard, so I started wearing a pointy hat to the grocery store, and I feel powerful.
• That awkward moment when you realize you’re more of a Neville Longbottom than a Harry Potter, and you are still trying to be good.
• I tried to explain the Harry Potter series to my little brother, but he just asked, “Are there dragons?”

Potterhead Problems: Relatable Harry Potter Memes We All Understand

Calling all Potterheads! Ever felt personally victimized by Umbridge or cried during Snape’s memories? This collection of hilarious Harry Potter memes perfectly captures the struggles of being a devoted fan. From awkward Patronus moments to desperately awaiting your Hogwarts letter, get ready to laugh because these relatable jokes hit harder…

• Dumbledore: “It does not do well to dwell on dreams and forget to live, but I will always have a lot of dreams, and I will be here.”
• “Expecto Patronum” but it’s me trying to summon the energy to get out of bed on a Monday morning, and I cannot do it.
• Hogwarts house sorting is just a personality quiz with extra steps, and also a talking hat that will tell you all about yourself.
• Hermione: “I’m going to bed.” Ron: “But it’s only 8 PM!” Hermione: “I need to recharge my Hermione Granger powers!”
• Me trying to explain the entire Harry Potter series to someone who’s only seen the movies, “There are too many details to mention!”
• Sirius Black escaped Azkaban, but he’s still wanted for dog walking without a leash, and also because he is a dog.
• “I’d like to thank J.K. Rowling for creating a magical world that I could escape to, and also to make me feel bad about myself.”
• I tried to learn magic, but I accidentally turned my homework into a frog.
• “The good thing is, I get to see my favorite characters. The bad thing is, I don’t get to see my favorite characters.”
• “I tried to read Harry Potter, but I got too distracted by the magical world to finish the story, and I do not know what happened.”
• Why did Hermione cross the road? To get to the other side and use magic to make the world a better place!
• Professor Trelawney says, “The tea leaves say you’re going to have a bad day.” Me: “I’m always having a bad day”.
• What if Voldemort just wanted a hug, and that is why he was so evil, or is he was just bad?
• If I had a time-turner, I’d go back and stop myself from reading spoilers, and I would be happy.
• Harry, Ron, and Hermione are my favorite, but I can not pick just one, they are all great in their own way.